-raindrops-

Today was a good day.

My husband, Aaron, was able to come home from the hospital.

He has a history of bowel perforations after having his large intestine removed due to his Ulcerative Colitis, so anytime he has a stomach issue, he ends up in the hospital.

The stress of his health has really worn on me over the years. I joke and tell people I think I have some form of PTSD from all of his health scares. Anytime he has a pain of any sort, I get sick to my stomach. Too many times, I've planned out in my head how I would tell my children their daddy passed away. It's morbid to think about, but it's real. I've almost had to have the talk a few times, and it's scared me to death. My kids are what get me through. I have to put on a brave face foe them, so that gets me through the days. They keep me pretty busy not only physically, but mentally. God knew what he was doing blessing me with each one of them.

This evening it stormed and Lacey begged me to play in the rain. I watched her as she giggled and jumped in the puddles, and turned her face up to the sky to catch the raindrops. It was good for my soul. My kids suck every ounce of energy out of me, and some days I wonder how I pulled through it all, but they replace it with a beauty that's hard to describe unless you are a parent yourself. Sometimes I feel as if my heart could burst with too much love. It makes the exhaustion bearable.

Today was chaotic, but it was beautiful.

xoxo